When I thought you were coming on Valentine’s Day…

I was scared. I was selfishly wondering how “I” was going to handle that. As a woman who is just starting to embrace pink and release lies of what femininity is, I was about to be pushed over the edge with a Valentine’s Day baby.

 And THEN GOD…

Then God started changing my heart. Slowly, but abruptly on this day, THIS Valentine’s Day He gave me a new perspective. It is His grace that I receive when I do these things. Make up my mind about the way things are and then as I work to release lies and replace them with new truths, His truth, I am awakened to a new sense of joy and peace for the way He loves. And isn’t that what Valentine’s Day is all about. For believers we are to use this day and every day to receive and share His love.

And that is when I realized it was not sharing the love on Valentine’s Day that was so fearful for me all these years before, it was receiving it. Being vulnerable to a day where people went out of their way to share with you what has been captured in their heart about you. This has been a challenge, but I am learning. God has used my marriage, my family, and some dear and unconditionally loving friends to love me into a place of receiving love.

And so for me Valentine’s Day is no longer a day of fear or of “measuring up” like the world would like it to be. “What did you get him?”, “What did he get you?” and all of the other ways we minimize love to be something that is bought and delivered in packages and price tags, but more something that is offered and received direct from hearts only.

And so, it is love that God gave me when I thought you would be born today. Love over my selfishness to think I new this day wouldn’t be best. He allows me now not only to meet you soon, (and I can hardly wait) but also with this new found appreciation for love so that I am able to pass that on to you. You are already a gift to me…Happy Valentine’s Day to the warrior in my tummy that is already teaching me about Our Father and His Grace and Loving Mercies.

I can not wait to see your face today or which ever day He says is yours!